Article Source: msnbc.com
from:msnbc.comYou're in Easy Mode. If you prefer, you can use XHTML Mode instead. |
Spacecraft repair droids could extend lives of satellitesMock Mars rover takes test drive in the desertAncient 'Loch Ness monster' suffered from arthritis in jawBill criminalizing viewing child porn online OK'd by NY SenateGM plans to stop advertising on FacebookOldest evidence of insect pollination foundUFO video causes a stir in MexicoRussian satellite takes a striking image of EarthSmokey Bear along for the ride to space station The angry sun: How they predict space weather
Leave a Comment:
In response to the comments made from the "gamer husbands" supporting their habits, this WOULD be an expected, and appropriate response from someone who is addicted to something. Whether it be video/computer games, drugs, gambling, eating, etc. People who are addicted and are not ready for a change, will make excuses for themselves, and look to others to make the change, ie, the wives/family. Someone who doesn't recognize that they have a problem will think it's everyone else around them who has the problem. It's just easier to say "then leave me" or "why did you get with me in the first place?", then it is to say "yes, I recognize that I DO have a problem, because it's causing issues in my REAL LIFE relationships. I just have a hard time accepting that because it's something I don't want to quit". It takes getting to "rock bottom" in relationships for a lot of addicts to recognize that, even though they love their "drug", they have no choice but to make a change themselves.
I think this was a wonderful, well-written article about a real "underground" sort of issue. I'm sure a lot of people know someone else (a "gamer widow") who is going through this same thing. The more this is talked about, the more likely it is to become a known psychiatric issue or addiction that can happen to anybody.
I'm sorry, I just fail to see why this is such an issue.
It's not like they're taking hard drugs or anything, these gamers are just consuming a form of entertainment.
An easy solution would be to take an interest (however small) in the game and what they're doing so you can play together.
I play games and when someone close to me takes an interest, I get really excited because I get share what I'm passionate about with someone else.
Gaming isn't a future drug addiction, it's a hobby
As someone who broke my own gaming addiction, it is just as dehabilitating as hard drugs. You don't eat, you don't sleep. You get angry when interrupted, sometimes even have the shakes when you can't play. The only real difference is it doesn't have the lasting side effects that some of the hard drugs do, and it's not fatal to try to quit. If you take an interest, then you're just encouraging the problem.
Oh, and I still play MMO's... so I'm not saying they're bad, they aren't a good hobby or anything. They're great, you just have to watch out for getting too trapped into them. That's the difference between an addiction and a hobby. And sometimes it's a really fine line.
Omari...it is a HUGE probelm. They are not shooting up but the result is the same. It can be just as fatal, you can die from sleep deprivation, blood clots that form because they are gaming for hours on end & not moving. In less than 2yrs my husband gained over 100lbs and developed diabetis, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. He is a ticking time bomb. His 18yr old step daughter is following her dad's lead and has gained over 80lbs. Neither think they have a problem. In a way I wish my husband would have had a chemical dependancy. It is horrible trying to explain to someone that your husband chose a video game over you and your children. People sympathize and tend to show more compassion to a spouse of a chemically dependant person, they tend to laugh and express how pathetic it is when the spouse is a video game addict.
Hmm.. didn't the wives pull this same crap on thier husbands when they all flocked to watch TV shows like: Dancing With The Stars, Big Brother, Survivor, The Bachelor, Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire, The Biggest Loser, and the rest of those other so-called "reality shows" that no normal person has ever done before these shows came along? My TV has a script, paid actors and has no "prize" except for the "real" reality shows; where the "prize" is getting out alive.. like The Alaska Experiment, The Deadliest Catch, etc.
I understand you did not "marry a gamer". But that is what he is now. I went through the exact same thing, I can empathize with your situation. If you choose to stay in the relationship, knowing what you do and accepting his treatment of you, you give up the right to complain about it. Do you have children?? This is the reason I finally got a divorce. I do not feel it is a good example at all to my children to watch their mother be married to someone who does not contribute to the family. My husband basically ignored us for gaming and that is unacceptable. I especially would not want a daughter to think that behavior would be acceptable in her life later on. People deserve better - don't you want a real relationship instead of being a maid and cook for someone who plays games all day???? I know it is hard to let go, but it does not sound like he is the man you married. If you are waiting for him to change, I think you will be waiting a long time.
Kelly....you are 100%. My husband was a "gamer" but not to the extent he is now, when we met and after we first married he would play for an hour and be done. It was a stress outlet for him, then it became an addiction. I, like you, packed my kids & stuff up and left him. Life is too short to waste it being married to someone who is miserable and makes you miserable. My kids are old enough they know, they see dad has gained a lot of weight & doesn't cut his hair anymore. They laugh because they know it is sad he hides in the basement and pretends to life a life that doesnt exist instead of the one he has.
Ummmm Sherry of Toronto is pretty cute... if her husband doesn't want to pay attention to her I will. I like MMORPG too but if I had that at home I would be on taking care of business first...
How sad to waste you life away for "a game."
I've never been married, but two of my past relationships have failed because the other person spent almost all their free time playing video games. In the first case, I was actually dumped because my boyfriend would prefer to play WoW than spend any time with me (talk about a blow to my self esteem). In the second, I left my live-in partner who lost his job and instead of trying to find another just spent 10-12 hours a day playing Lord of the Rings Online. The saddest part of all is that all of this happened before I or either partner was 25. If they don't get help with their addictions, I pity the women who marry them.
i know that feeling, i thought something was wrong with me. i finally had an epiphany and realized it wasn't me, i packed my stuff and left, we are now going through a divorce as a result of his addiction. be glad you got out when you did. now when i meet guys i ask, do you like to play video games, if they answer yes i move on.
I am now going through a divorce because of his gaming addiction. He plays on an average 10-12hrs of WoW or sometimes second life a DAY. It has affected his health (he has gained a huge amount of weight), his marriage (i got tired of being ignored and left) and it has affected his job(he falls asleep on the job.) His 18yr old daughter from a previous relationship is headed in the same direction, in less than 2 yrs she has gained over 80lbs. The sad thing is that neither of them think they have a problem.
My husband doesn't play WoW, but he plays other video games on the playstation, and I must say I feel like a widow! Here lately he plays up to 12-14 hours a day. A "normal" day for him is to wake up around 11 ( because of a late night) eat, head upstairs to the spare room around 12 and play until 7 30, come down spend 20 min w/ our son, then he goes back up at 8 and stays there until 2, 3 or 4 in the morning!! This is insane! What do I do??? Nagging doesn't work, and I am lonely!